When Winter Comes, We'll Leave Behind Us...

I'm wondering if wanting a thing too much ruins it. If somehow the yearning gives it away. Suddenly you're found out, so the situation, the thing, loses its luster. People can see you in your eyes, that you want it too badly, and it either scares them or disgusts them. Either way, it's gone.

I am torn constantly between a fear of settling for what I have ... of it not being good enough, and the worry that I am ruining a good thing because I don't know how good I have it.

I'm not much for logic. This is readily apparent to anyone who has known me for longer than five minutes. The things I value, my personal moral system, if you will, is what drives me. I know what is it important to me, even if I'm terrible at math, systematic reasoning, what have you.

I struggle to compromise on these things of importance to me. Perhaps I don't want to compromise. I don't think I am a terribly black and white person, but there are certain things you simply don't do if you really care about a person and there are certain ways to show that you really do care.

But I don't want this to be it. There should be more than this. I don't care if it's naive, or too idealistic.

I want it all, and I'll be damned if I don't at least try.

Your feelings can't be that dulled, you can't be numb to it all.

I know it won't always be the first, it can't always be the first, or all new for you. But it should be the best, the World Series kind of thing... whether you say it is or not.

I'll keep trying, I have to. Otherwise, it's really not enough.

William Gibson's Pattern Recognition

Best known for the classic "Necromancer," William Gibson's works top any avid sci fi reader's list. I have no idea why it took me so long to get around to reading something of his. All I can say now is, I'm glad I finally did.

"Pattern Recognition," from 2003, tells the story of Cayce Pollard, a New Yorker who travels the world telling companies what the next "it" thing will be due to her sixth sense for trends. Cayce knows what products are going to catch on before they really break into mainstream culture. Brands and logos truly effect her -- Prada, Tommy Hilfinger, Disney ... they all make her ill. She has to cut the labels out of her own clothing so that she can actually put them on.

Engrossing, fascinating look at advertising and marketing and its affects on society.

Books at the Huffington Post: "Why a book section now?"

Why books won't stay banned or ever really go away, no matter how virtual our society gets:

"So when Arianna asked me to think about a Books section for The Huffington Post, I thought, why a new books section, why Huffington Post, wjavascript:void(0)hy now?

Because there's never been a better time or place. People who think books are dying don't understand the power of ideas to inspire. And people who think books will die at the hands of the Internet, don't understand the power of what happens when an engaged reader -- of both web and print content -- discovers new ideas, new thoughts, new thinkers, or remembers the impact of a classic. Word spreads faster than ever, and the ensuing debate helps refine ideas for the future."

Read more at: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/amy-hertz/books-the-watering-hole_b_308756.html

Lev Grossman's The Magicians

When I first heard about Lev Grossman's new novel, "The Magicians," from NPR about two months ago, I was a bit skeptical. Grossman and the NPR correspondent Tom Vitale called the book an "adult Harry Potter," set in a modern-day Brooklyn. The book centers on Quentin Coldwater, a dissatisfied high school senior who escapes life and reality by continually re-reading a fantasy series from his childhood, which takes place in the magical land of Fillory.

Toward the end of his senior year, Quentin is interviewing with ivy league schools and listlessly preparing to carry on his lackadaisical life at Princeton. While chasing a dropped paper through a community garden in New York, he finds himself never reaching the back of the garden. Eventually, he walks far enough into it for it to become the grounds of Brakebills College, a school of Magical Pedagogy. From there, Quentin's world is altered irrevocably as he discovers both magic and his beloved Fillory are real.

"The Magicians" draws heavily both on Lewis' "Chronicles of Narnia" and on J.K. Rowling's "Harry Potter" series. Grossman admits that Fillory and its gods are more or less Narnia and Aslan. But this is no children's book. The characters and plot are far more complex and far less black and white than anything Lewis or Rowling have created. The majority of the novel takes place in our own world, where the harshness of reality plays more of a role in the characters' lives than many of the fantasy or science fiction novels I've read.

And therein lies the works' real strength.

Grossman refuses to ignore reality, regardless of what world or plane of existence its characters are in, no matter how fantastic the setting or creature. Quentin deals with real-world issues that many in college students and post-grads would face. The book is less about who is good or evil and more about what magic is for, what life is for, and Quentin struggles with the questions just as much as the rest of us. He screws up, and he actually has to pay for his mistakes. There is no Dumbledore there to make sure Quentin isn't expelled for breaking the rules. There is no "happily ever after." Grossman's fantasy worlds are just as harsh as our own world. The characters are sympathetic, believable and fallible, and well worth seeing through to the end.

This is Grossman's first step into Science Fiction/Fantasy, and I hope he doesn't stop here. Though a standalone, I almost wish it was the start of a series or a trilogy. Yes, it's really that good.

Ellen Hopkins is my Hero

Last Wednesday, I went to see Ellen Hopkins at Borders in Ann Arbor. She is one of the coolest authors I've seen in a while... inspiring to her readers, a huge supporter of literary rights and Banned Book Week,  and an amazing writer to boot. She is one of few authors in the Young Adult genre who writes in verse. Encouraging poetry in teens is no small feat. While it may scare off some, Hopkins told her audience Wednesday that most of her readers are teens who do not typically read. Poetry on suicide, child prostitution, drugs, sex, addiction ... typically when I start one of her books, I can't put it down.

"Torch every book.
Burn every page.
Char every word to ash.
Ideas are incombustible.
And therein lies your real fear."

If you ever get the opportunity to go to one of her readings or meet Ellen Hopkins, I encourage you to do so. She will not disappoint.

New Blog? Maaaybe.

Some recent conversations of the past few weeks on Facebook, Twitter, Chat and elsewhere have given me a new idea for a blog.

I never update this thing and am in the process of building my own Web site - long overdue, but finally at least purchased the URL - and I want to have a more "hobby-based" blog to post with it. So, I think I am going to kill this one and make a new one that focuses strictly on books and music. Facebook mostly keeps track of those things for me, but I would be able to brand this one myself.

We'll see how it goes, or if I ever actually get around to doing it. Still, I am more excited about this attempt at blogging than I have been about the medium in a while.

Fall is coming up too fast

Wow. Summer goes by much too quickly when you move three times, then spend two more weeks moving other people's stuff after all of your stuff is moved in.

How is it already the middle of September?

Six weeks after moving, life is slowly, slowly starting to get back to a steady routine. For the past six weeks, we have had tons of visitors and house updates: Neil's parents coming up to help paint and clean and move, friends coming up to see the new house, installing air conditioning, a new furnace, new carpet, painting three rooms upstairs, de-wallpapering rooms, etc. It has been a blur of changes and non-stop work.

But things are inevitably slowing down. And fall is here. Neil and I bought our first pumpkin over the weekend. Can't wait for baked pumpkin seeds again, easily one of my favorite things about fall.

Busy weekends have meant slower weekdays, and I have finally started to catch up on reading. And television, like BSG (which I am completely addicted to), Burn Notice and Glee, my three latest obsessions.

So now, instead of spending all of my time moving and painting and organizing and unpacking... I spend all of my time reading and watching television. Really, I think it is a shift for the best. heh.